The Heart Brought Me Back
by FabrayLover
Summary: There are experiences that stay with you no matter what. Quinn's accident that fateful day being one of them.


They had just finished a pleasant dinner cooked by Kurt at the loft. While they were cleaning up the dishes and putting away the leftovers, Rachel felt a pair of arms circle her waist from behind and a soft kiss to her cheek.

"Do you need any help?"

Rachel tilted her head to look at Quinn briefly before resuming her task.

"I have it under control, don't worry. Just go sit down and relax, I'll be there in a minute."

"At your command, gorgeous." Quinn smiled against her neck and let her go to join Santana on the couch.

"I'm so envious of you two, is insane," said Kurt, who was next to her drying the cutlery, and sighed wistfully.

"Oh, Kurt, you'll find someone soon, I can feel it in my bones."

"You and your sixth sense?"

"It hasn't failed me until now. You should trust it."

Kurt rolled her eyes at that comment. It has failed countless times but decided to let it go. "So… how is life with Quinn Fabray as your girlfriend?"

Rachel cut her gaze to him, and beamed. "Wonderful. The best feeling in the world. She is amazing, so attentive, and she puts up with my diva tantrums. That's new. What more can I ask for?" Rachel said dreamily and then added to wind up the boy: "And Kurt, she is so so so good in bed. I mean, she does this thing with her…"

Kurt let out a shriek and put his hands over his ears to prevent hearing anymore. "Rachel!" The brunette only laughed at the distressed boy. "I don't want to know anything about your sex life. Do you hear me? I don't want to be scarred for life. I bought those earplugs for a reason after that horrendous time that should-not-be-mentioned."

"Okay, okay, I'll shut up. So prudish."

Rachel deposited the last item in the right place and walked to the couch to the girls leaving a red-faced Kurt in the kitchen.

"What was that about? Hummel seemed like he was going to blow up or something."

"Oh, nothing, we were just talking about how awesome my girlfriend is in every single aspect." Rachel directed a sweet smile to Quinn.

Quinn raised her eyebrow and looked suspiciously at Rachel. "What aspects?"

"You know, like you surprise me sometimes with romantic gestures, you listen to me rant about crazy things and you..."

Santana finished her sentence before she could. "And you leave Berry sexually satisfied with those skinny fingers."

Quinn turned beet red at the comment and Rachel glared at Santana. "That was necessary?"

"Actually, it was. That was what you were going to say, right?"

"Of course not! I'm not… you!"

"So you didn't say anything sex related to Kurt to annoy him?"

"Okay, guilty as charged." She cut her gaze to Quinn and took her hand. "But it was just a joke, I swear, Quinn, I don't talk about our sex life with anyone. That's too private."

"Okay." Quinn squeezed her hand with a small smile on her lips.

"I wouldn't mind hearing about it." Quinn grabbed a pillow and hit Santana in the head with it." Santana rolled yes eyes. "Watch it, blondie. It was an innocent suggestion."

Kurt decided that moment to show up and plopped down on the loveseat.

"What are you girls up to?"

Santana smirked. "We were talking about maybe start looking for a boyfriend for you. You have been alone for too long. I'm sure you feel... frustrated. Maybe you would be willing to check online dating? I bet you would find a real catch in there." She wiggled her eyebrows for good measure.

Kurt looked horrified and Rachel added: "You are too picky, Kurt. At this rate, Santana will have a girlfriend before you will."

"Hey!" Santana yelled with a glare. "If I wanted to, I would have one. I'm fine like this. I love to be single, I don't have someone to tell me what can and cannot do."

"Rachel doesn't tell me what I can do. Right, baby?" Rachel nodded seriously. "You don't become someone's slave by being in a relationship."

"Exactly. Sweetie, can you pass me the remote?"

"Oh, yeah, of course." Quinn leaned forward to take it and gave it to Rachel. Rachel pressed a kiss to the blonde's lips and smiled at Santana who barked a laugh.

"Yeah, I totally see what you're saying, Q. You're so whipped, oh my God." Santana cackled.

Before Quinn could tell her to fuck off and start fighting like two kids Kurt interjected. "Okay, time out! What about that movie?"

Rachel turned the TV on, and started searching for a movie. "Look this one. It seems interesting. Sounds good?"

The three of them nodded, and accommodated on her seats to watch the movie comfortably with Quinn slipping her arm around Rachel's shoulders and Rachel cuddling to her.

Everything was going fine until certain scene of the movie showed up: a brutal car accident. A shiver ran down Quinn's body and she swallowed tightly against the lump in her throat. Rachel noticed Quinn's tense body and looked between her girl and the screen a couple of times.

"Oh, God, are you okay?" At the sound of Rachel's voice Kurt and Santana turned to look at their friends confused before realization dawned on them. Rachel took Quinn's face in her hands to make her look at her.

"Uh?" Quinn focused her gaze on Rachel and nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. It's no big deal. It's just a simple movie."

"Q, we can take it off. We can watch something else or whatever you prefer..."

"Seriously, it's okay." Quinn declared firmly. Rachel couldn't help but sigh. She was worried about her girlfriend. Quinn looked a little pale but she knew how stubborn she could be and that she hated feeling vulnerable. "Eyes to the movie, please, I'm not a painting."

Kurt and Santana shifted their gazes to the screen quickly but Rachel kept watching the blonde closely. Quinn noticed it and pecked her lips softy.

"I love you, but please, leave it, okay?" Quinn whispered so only Rachel could hear. Rachel complied but she barely paid attention to the rest of the movie. She was worried about what was going on in Quinn's head and the lost look on Quinn eyes was not helping.

When it was over, they were almost asleep on the couch. They said their goodnights and went to bed. Once in there, Rachel slipped her arm around Quinn's waist and tried to get as close as humanly possible to the blonde. "You know, you don't have to be strong all the time," she spoke softly into the darkness of the room.

"Rachel, the accident happened almost two years ago, I'm fine, really."

"I know that, but... you never talk about it, at least not to me, and it was something that deeply affected you as a person. Physically and emotionally."

"Rach..." Quinn said pleadingly. "It's not something that I like to even think about it. I got over it."

"Not entirely. Every time you get into a car, for example, an alarm sets off inside you. You try to hide it but it's me, Quinn, I always see you."

Quinn sighed, exhausted and tired of the topic already. "Look, I appreciate how much you care about me, and I know you just want to help, but I'd rather not discuss this anymore. Why dig up the past?"

"Because the past, everything that happened, made you who you are today and you can't forget that or pretend otherwise," Rachel affirmed. "But I get it. I'm not going to pressure you to talk. Just know that I'm here when you are ready, okay?"

"I love you." Quinn kissed Rachel forehead before resting her head atop of Rachel's. "Let's go to sleep."

Quinn knew that what Rachel was saying was true. When the accident happened, she just concentrated on recovering and walking again. She didn't see a therapist, and once all her hard work met her expectations she moved past it, keeping under key all the feelings and emotions during that difficult time. She let out a tired sigh and tried to clear her mind in vain before drifting off.

* * *

_Quinn found herself in a familiar hallway. Everything was the same as the last time she had been here. It was quiet, not a single noise could be heard from her position. She started moving forward. She turned a few hallways but the school seemed empty. She tried to open a few doors but they didn't move an inch, so she just kept walking, until she heard an echo of her own voice and stopped in her tracks._

_"How do I look? Coach Sylvester gave it to me earlier, and I couldn't resist."_

_"Well, I'm glad you're happy. Everyone deserves to be happy."_

_She started running, desperately looking for the voices. That conversation was one of the hardest of her life, where she decided to support Rachel despite her feelings towards the girl and thinking the wedding was a crazy mistake that they would regret in the near future._

_"When you were singing that song, you were singing it to Finn and only Finn. Right? He really does make you so happy. I want to support you, Rachel, and Finn, and come to the wedding if it's not too late."_

_She turned a hallway and she finally was met with Rachel throwing herself happily at the other Quinn and she saw herself trying to reciprocate the hug with anguish painted in her face and tears welled up in her eyes. She swallowed tightly before suddenly a hole opened up on the floor and she started falling and screaming. _

_It lasted for like seemed a lifetime before she found herself in the backseat of a car that she would recognize anywhere. She looked to the driver seat and saw herself fixing her make-up. She knew what was going to happen in a few minutes and a wave of fear settled in her gut. She saw her phone vibrating with the first message from Rachel and saw herself ignore it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She heard the phone vibrating again a few seconds later and she opened her eyes to watch herself cave in and take the phone to answer Rachel. _

_She grabbed herself the best she could in the backseat and prepare herself for the impact. She glanced to her left where the truck was coming from. She started breathing erratically. ON MY WAY. The truck crashed brutally on the driver's side, she closed her eyes afraid of what would happen next and suddenly she heard a voice in her head out of nowhere._

* * *

"Quinn, wake up." She shook the blonde girl gently, who seemed to be having a nightmare. Quinn was trashing and that's why Rachel woke up in the first place, startled at the sudden movement. She stroked Quinn's cheek with a finger before patting it with more strength. She just needed her to open her eyes.

Quinn murmured something unintelligible still asleep and Rachel tilted her head in confusion.

Rachel, feeling helpless and scared, began shaking Quinn sharply and finally, Quinn's glassy eyes suddenly opened and she gasped.

Quinn felt disoriented for a few seconds before she felt a warm body cover her own.

"What…?"

"Sorry. I just… you seemed to be hurting and I figured you were having a nightmare."

"Oh, God. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." Rachel felt Quinn's face and realized she was soaked in sweat. You should go refresh a little. And I'll get you a glass of water."

Quinn obeyed without a protest before going to the bathroom to cool herself. She remembered what she had dreamt about unfortunately. The damn accident. She could still feel an echo of the pain from the crash. She splashed her face and arms before drying them with a towel. Soon enough, Rachel showed up with water.

"Drink a little. It will do you good."

Quinn took it from Rachel's hands and complied. The cool water passing over a dry throat did wonders to her. After she was finished, she casted her gaze to Rachel who was still in front of her with worried eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to… This hadn't happened in a long time." Quinn apologized.

"What were you dreaming about?" Rachel asked curiously.

"Things from the day of the accident." Quinn replied truthfully.

"Could you be more concrete?"

Quinn sighed tiredly but answered: "At first, I saw us, in the hallway at school, when I asked you if the song was only about Finn." Rachel made a face of understanding and Quinn continued. "And then… I was in the car, when the accident occurred. I was there. I felt the hit all over again. I woke up just after it happened though, I think I heard you calling my name as strange as it sounds."

"Mmm. Well, I tried to wake you up for a while."

They stared at each other for a few moments before Quinn spoke up.

"We should go to bed and rest. It's late."

"I don't… " Rachel tried to refuse but Quinn was already walking away to the bedroom. She sighed and shook her head before following Quinn.

* * *

They lay in bed for what felt like hours, both of them immersed on their own thoughts and listening the breathing of the other in the dark room.

"I was conscious, you know?" Quinn spoke quietly.

Rachel turned her head at the sound of Quinn's voice, confused. "What?"

"After the truck hit me, I lost consciousness for... I don't how long, but I guess it wasn't much because when I woke up again I was still there, trapped in the car." Rachel remained silent knowing that an interruption now wouldn't be well received and she wanted to hear what Quinn had to say. "I was in shock, I didn't know what was happening, everything was so confusing, my head felt fuzzy. There was blood everywhere. And I don't know, after the initial shock wore off enough, I think my mind started to catch up."

"I was in so much pain, though my legs seemed to not be there at all. Rachel, it was like an out-of-body experience. So surreal..." Quinn inhaled deeply and continued. "I remember the moment where I thought: This is it. I'm going to die." Rachel, with tears in her eyes, couldn't hold herself anymore and reached out her hand to take Quinn's. She needed contact, reassurance. "After everything that I had gone through, with Beth, my family, Lucy, after turning my life around, what was going to kill me was a stupid accident on my way to your wedding because I got distracted."

"It just wasn't fair. I had a whole life ahead of me. I wanted to live. And I remember my last thought before I passed out."

Rachel swallow tightly. She didn't trust her voice in that moment, so she whispered her question: "What was it?"

Quinn turned bright eyes with unshed tears to her girlfriend. "You."

"Oh, sweetie." Rachel launched herself to Quinn and enveloped her in a hug. She rested her ear over the blonde's heart. Its strong heartbeat was so comforting.

"I thought that I would never see your smile again, your expressive eyes which are a window to your very soul, I would never hear you sing again, that beautiful voice. You would never know what I felt for you, and how deeply my love was, and still is."

"I prayed to God that He would let me live, to come back to you and show you how much I cared about you in any capacity you would let me be in your life. It was a miracle that I survived, Rachel. I firmly believe that I was given this second chance for you, Rachel. That's the only explanation I can find. My heart never gave up because I needed to find my way back to you. My fate wasn't to die in that road, you were waiting for me. But you saved me long before the crash, in reality. I lost myself so many times, but... somehow you always found me and brought me back. That has to mean something, right?"

Rachel raised her head from Quinn's chest and Quinn could see the tears running from her cheeks.

"Please, don't cry." Quinn reached out a hand and wipe the tears carefully from Rachel's face. "I can't stand to see you cry, baby."

"I don't know if it was fate or a miracle but I'm so grateful everyday that you're here, with me. Life without you doesn't have any sense. I love you so much." Rachel tilted her head and kissed Quinn's lips chastely before deepening the kiss.

After what felt like an eternity, they pulled apart, but neither of them opened their eyes, they just rested their foreheads together and breathed each other in.

"Thank you." Quinn whispered reverently.

"For what?"

"For loving me back."

* * *

The next morning they woke up late and already tired. They hadn't slept much after their emotional talk and they would have happily stayed in bed all day just cuddling. But their friends weren't going to be generous or quiet in that respect.

Kurt and Santana seemed to be arguing about something related to breakfast. After a shared eye roll, Rachel and Quinn got up and went to see what the hassle was about.

"Look who decided to grace us with their presence!" Santana exclaimed sarcastically. "Morning sex or just laziness on your part?"

"Shut up." Rachel ordered and Santana raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"We are cranky this morning, huh?" After one look from Quinn, she decided to be nice for once, or as nice as she could be at least. "I'll make breakfast today, because someone in here that I'm not going to point out, Kurt, that's for you, is being a pain on the ass."

"You are really exaggerating." Kurt murmured.

"Thanks, Santana." Quinn said and sat down next to Rachel.

They all ate breakfast in relative silence, with only trivial comments once in a while. Kurt observed Rachel and Quinn discreetly and noticed the bags under their eyes. He furrowed his brow in concern and decided to ask. "Is everything okay, Rach? You seem tired and I swear I heard some fuss in the middle of the night."

Rachel looked at Quinn, who was eating peacefully her toast. Quinn, sensing eyes on her, looked up and smiled. Rachel smiled back before answering Kurt: "It's perfect."


End file.
